How It Turned Out

Well my x and I have been doing things together with my daughter. I am going out of my mind with boredom so I started suggesting we get together on the weekends.

So now we are doing family things together. We have taken my daughter to the book store. We took her Roller Skating and to the park. We took her to the bike trail where she rode her new bike he got her. He paid almost $400 for it and doesn't pay me a dime in child support.

We go back to court on Monday. I asked him if we could go back to the way things were before, where I didn't need a supervisor with my daughter. He could make this battle last for years. He said he didn't have a problem with it but he needed to talk to his lawyer. So I know the lawyer is just going to milk it for more money.

I am physically and emotionally drained. I'm hanging on by a thread. I don't know what to do with myself half the time. It has been one month and a week since this has been going on.

Now I have to spend time with them together and I have to watch every word I say and make sure I act perfect. I am really a nice person. I am not mean or out to hurt anyone but that is not the way these guys see it. Not by what they claim in court.

Anyway that is what I have been dealing with as a single parent. Is there anyone out there that can relate to my situation?

Your children grow

My son is a joy to have around. When he was twelve he walked into the court and said he wanted to live with me. Since he has been back he has been a joy to have around.

He will be seventeen in a week and he has grown to be such a man. He is still very young though.

He makes me very proud. He has always been on the Football Team and Basketball Team in school. He just won an award for most improved player when he joined the Swim Team this year. He lettered and everything. I was never so proud as when he recieved that award. He has made me awful proud in the past. When he played football and basketball but that was my proudest sports moment for him.

He is also very helpful when my x's are giving me a hard time. He hears the way they talk to me and watches what they do and he is not stupid. He is always on my side and tells me to relax. He gave up trying to make me quit cigarettes. I have quit many times but as soon as and x will start I reach for the cigarettes.

He knows that is the only thing I do. I am a dedicated single mother. I am in college full time to earn my bachelor's in Professional Writing. I have a minor in Secondary Education just about and I also have and associates in General Studies.

I stay home and do the cooking and the cleaning. I am here when they leave for school and here when they come home. I am a dedicated mother.

I have also picked up a couple jobs cleaning and I am expanding that until I can graduate next semester then I get to look for and office job or maybe finish my books I have written. Who knows.

All I know is my son supports me in all this stuff. It was him who helped me decide to change my major to Professional Writing. It is him who comes food shopping with me all the time. It is him I go to when I need to borrow a couple of bucks and he always has it.

He works too. He has had a job at Roller Kingdom now for over a year. He got his permit the day he turned the right age. He payed for his own drivers ed and is now going for his liscense.

He makes me so proud and is always here for me. Some day my daughter will be old enough to do the same thing.

It's the control

Thank the lord above that my x agreed to let my mother do it. Otherwise we were to split the cost and it is 40 and hour. For supervised visits that is.

Mon-Wens-Fri my mother has to sit here from 3:30 til 7:30 while I visit with my daughter. Only that is not how it ended up working out. He didn't get here til almost four every day and as soon as I asked him to help me with the driving he started to pick her up at 7:00. We have to drive half way to pick my mohter up. She only drives halfway then I go meet her, pick her up and then he started dropping her off. After I was doing all of it for a solid few weeks.

Plus I was suppose to be getting her off the bus, but he wouldn't let me. He picks her up off the bus takes her home, removes all her homework from her bag, I haven't seen it in weeks, and then brings her here. He comes in and talks and sometimes it is hard to get rid of him. See it is not the childs attention they want they have that. It is the power over you they crave. If your x is anything like mine, read into this what you will.

I have chosen three men in a row who have done things to me that I can't prove so I'm not allowed to say them. You can draw your own conclusion on how far they have gone. Let's just say that I get Social Security because I have a condition called Post Traumatic Stress. My doctors say that my whole life I lived in a war zone. From my childhood on because of this war zone my doctors believe that my mind and body are battered beyond repair.

I have several Dr's. the only thing that maintains me now is medicine. When I am under attack I have to take medicine for my nerves. When everything is going fine I am okay without it. My physical body, some things I can't do anymore. Places on my body will hurt at certain times. I have medical conditions that have actually kept me back for about four years. It just all caught up with me. Especially in my body. My mind is fine. I take medicine to calm my nerves and to sleep at night other wise I would constantly be thinking about my daughter and reliving that day in court. It is my physical body that is the problem.

It is the control that people want over you. I can't point out anyone specific and I can only legally say some things. I could get sued if I ever accused anyone of anything and couldn't prove it. I have every right to say what the Dr's have said.

Take a look at who I am. I am just a loving single parent who is trying to provide a safe and happy home for my children.

I lost custody

Take it from someone who has been through the ringer. Loosing custody of one of your children is devastating.

This is my second child that I have lost in a custody battle. My sons father did this to me when my son was just six. Now my daughter's father just walked into the court and took away physical custody. All cause he bought a lawyer.

It is a long story about the custody issues we have been facing and if you haven't been following my blog, you won't know that this was retaliation for when I kept my daughter here. It was the night he wanted to take her and she didn't want to go so I called the cops and they allowed her to stay.

Shortly after that he went into the court with a lawyer and said that I threatened to leave the state with my daughter and he smelled pot when he came over. He also said that I would act funny when he was here like move things around to different tables. I swear that was what he said.

I went in without a lawyer under the impression that everything was alright. He was getting along with me to my face, and we were suppose to drive to court to give me back physical custody from my hospital stay.

I will never drive to court with him again. He started this huge fight with me on the way in and had me all upset when we got in the court. He didn't tell me he had a lawyer waiting til we were half way there. It took us two hours in traffic then I had to drive home with him.

I still have joint legal custody but he is a sly one. The judge let him keep physical custody and I had to have supervised visits with my daughter. I was fit to be tied and walked out on the judge while he was still talking.

Like I said this happened to me with my son. A good lawyer can buy you anything in court. I lost my son for six years until he was twelve and he walked in the court himself and said he wanted to come live home with me.